Weird? No I’m Autistic

I’ve had a quite a few ‘weird’ little quirks over the years (and still do). I had no idea why I struggled with so many everyday activities, but here’s my list of just a few, see if you relate.

1. I won’t go to a hairdressers: the thought of small talk when I’m trapped somewhere that I can’t leave for the next 2 or 3 hours is way out of my comfort zone, no thank you.
2. I will not ask a shop assistant where a product is, I would rather walk around the whole shop several times and decide that they don’t have it, before I’d ask a member of staff for help.
3. I will not try on clothes is a shop, I would rather guess my size and then end up with something I can never wear, than ask an assistant where the changing rooms are. Ask for directions: no. Ask for help: no. Take my clothes off in a tiny booth: no. Return an item that doesn’t fit: no way!
4. I will not use toilets in restaurants or public spaces. Ask where they are: no, use a toilet that someone else just sat on: no. I would rather hold until my kidneys hurt, thank you very much.
5. I cannot swallow tablets, if I do try and one touches my tongue I will be sick, an utterly traumatic event. I have developed a way to swallow small pills or capsule medication without it touching my tongue, but it’s not 100% fool proof.
6. I cannot make a phone call, unless it’s to my husband. I get so anxious if I’m supposed to call someone back. The only calls I make are the ones I absolutely have to make for myself and it involves several weeks of planning and procrastinating before I can make that call.
7. I absolutely loathe parties, my husband has persuaded me to attend a few in our 41 years together, but always against my will and I will ideally sit alone at a table or stand in a corner, until I can sneak home without saying goodbye to anyone.
8. I do not make small talk. My conversation is me answering someone’s questions, until they give up and leave me alone.
9. I hate eating in a restaurant. I am a very picky eater and there is often only one dish on the menu I’m willing to try and often, I can’t even eat it. I have to scope out a restaurant in advance, check out the location and the menu, and then go begrudgingly, with my husband and best friend.
10. If you ask my opinion, you will get my opinion, not fluff, just the truth. I will tell you exactly what I think, like it or not.
11. As a follow on to number 9, I do not eat most foods, I am vegetarian and hate most vegetables, yes that’s right, try being me!
12. As a follow on to numbers 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 7, 8, and 10, I do not like to talk to strangers, if I don’t know you and you talk to me I will be polite and answer you, but I will NEVER start a conversation, I don’t hate you, I just don’t know you.

I had no idea that any of these can be autistic traits and I had no idea I was autistic for more than the first 50 years of my life.

I’m not just weird, I’m autistic.