🌿 What would likely have changed with an earlier diagnosis?

1. You would have had validation much earlier

Autistic women diagnosed late often say the same thing:

“I thought I was broken, lazy, dramatic, or failing.” “Everyone told me to just try harder.”

Earlier diagnosis could have:

Stopped years of self-blame Made sense of sensory issues, social exhaustion, and masking Given you a language for what you were experiencing Reduced the emotional toll of feeling “different” but not knowing why

Even in the 1990s/2000s, a diagnosis often gave people at least:

reassurance permission to rest a sense of identity

2. Schools might have made minor adjustments

But realistically:

Autism in girls was barely recognised at all before the late 2010s ADHD in girls wasn’t recognised until after 2019 in the way it is now “High functioning” (now outdated term) kids were assumed fine if they weren’t disruptive

You might have got:

extra time in exams exemption from group work a quiet workspace occasionally

But:

sensory issues, burnout, and masking were not understood girls who complied or got good grades were dismissed

So: some support, but nothing like modern knowledge.

3. ADHD medication could have protected your mental health

This is one of the biggest “missed benefits.”

If you’d been diagnosed with ADHD in adolescence or even your 20s/30s, you might have benefited from:

reduced overwhelm improved executive functioning fewer “why can’t I just do this?” cycles better emotional regulation less shame about mess, time blindness, and disorganisation

Medication and behavioural support have been available since the 1990s — but almost exclusively for boys.

As an adult woman, you simply wouldn’t have been assessed. Many NHS trusts didn’t allow referrals at all.

But IF you had been diagnosed, it would have helped.

4. You may have avoided some burnout episodes

Knowing your limits earlier could have meant:

less chronic overwork fewer years of intense masking avoiding environments that drained you more ability to say “no” less psychological and physical wear-and-tear

Burnout tends to accumulate over decades.

Earlier knowledge = earlier pacing = fewer crashes.

🌑 What probably would NOT have changed much?

1. The wider world wasn’t set up for autistic women

Through the 70s, 80s, 90s and 2000s:

Autism was defined through the behaviour of boys Girls were assumed “shy” or “quiet” Masking was invisible and unknown No one understood sensory overload Teachers expected compliance, not support

You would still have:

masked heavily been pushed to act “normal” been told to toughen up had your struggles dismissed

A diagnosis in childhood would not magically change social attitudes that simply weren’t there yet.

2. ADHD in women your age was not taken seriously

Until the mid-2010s:

ADHD was viewed as hyperactive little boys Women were told they were anxious, hormonal, or depressed Adults were told they “grew out of it”

Even with a diagnosis, you might have been:

doubted denied medication told to do CBT or be more organised

3. Mental health services had very limited understanding

Support for:

executive dysfunction autistic burnout sensory issues rejection sensitivity masking shutdowns

…didn’t exist as concepts.

Even mental health professionals weren’t trained in them until very recently.

So your later life experiences might look similar.

🔍 So overall… would it have changed your life?

💛 Emotionally — yes.

You would have:

understood yourself sooner avoided decades of self-blame had permission to be who you are felt less confusion and shame

🧠 Medically — ADHD treatment could have helped.

Diagnosis in the 1990s–2000s might have:

reduced chronic stress improved emotional regulation protected you from burnout prevented misunderstandings about “laziness” or “poor motivation”

🏫 Environmentally — probably not a huge difference.

Because the world simply wasn’t ready.

You were born too early for society’s understanding of autistic women and ADHD in adults.